This is a follow up to: Your 6P is sick? And yours? And Yours? And YOURS? AND YOURS? MINE TOO!

tl;dr; Go tell Google your phone is wetting itself in the Official Android Code Thread: Nexus 6P sh*tdown [sic] before battery is discharged

This is the state of my battery as reported in last week’s article:

I wish I could get load cycles, but I can’t, and I haven’t been able to find a simple way, even with Ampere Pro, if anyone wants to leave a comment on adb or terminal commands to get battery stats I will happily run them and post them!

Comment Poll!
Which of these disasters looks most like yours?
(All taken from the Nexus 6P sh*tdown [sic] before battery is discharged thread so I figure they are fair-use to repost)

Or post your own!